well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
