Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
