Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
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