i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
