This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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