I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
We're not piercing ourselves today.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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