Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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