dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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