And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
