Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Randomize
