i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
