whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
A+ Viking dick
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
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