Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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