There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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