She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
