I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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