So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
