I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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