we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
i need some magic done to my vagina
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
