who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
