Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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