i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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