She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize