Midget sex pt 2 tonight
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
