try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
no more duck duck goose at the bar
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
