What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
