We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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