Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
We need to get me chipped asap
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
