physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
