she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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