Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
