STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Just high enough for therapy.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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