Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry undercity101 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(314): View more from Missouri

Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed

Fav 33 1152 3050
share tweet
(424): View more from California

Do u kno any dealers?

(1-424): View more from California

I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.

Fav 36 3109 7951
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(905): View more from Toronto

when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college

Fav 43 1631 6623
share tweet
(864): View more from South Carolina

she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY

Fav 20 6593 1035
share tweet
(920): View more from Wisconsin

You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.

Fav 26 2115 7677
share tweet
(919): View more from North Carolina

They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible

Fav 7 4260 1377
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(561): View more from Florida

Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night

Fav 6 2852 995
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(682): View more from Texas

Okay so I just had a really great idea

(817): View more from Texas

no.

Fav 1 158 11
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(903): View more from Texas

I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...

Fav 0 43 9
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT