Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Randomize
