It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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