what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I'm too high and old for this...
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
