I seem to have left my pride at pride
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
