Say something about gay babies.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
he fucked my hip out of place.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
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