fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
