Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Randomize
