All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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