You really coming over, don't trick.
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
