Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize