So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
