Midget sex pt 2 tonight
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
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