I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
