so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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