I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
i think im in europe. pls send help
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I'm bleeding and have questions
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
