I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
