what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
